I think I may have a problem...

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First off, HEY, Guess what!  I'm not dead!!  Isn't that AWESOME??

Next on the agenda...you know how my handle is mommyRAMBLINGS, yeah well here you go.  I see that as permission to not only post well though out, meaningful posts, but reserve the right to also to use my blog as a platform...this is nothing new...if you haven't been around since the beginning of MommyRamblings.com, you may not be aware that my first ever, world changing post was titled *drumroll*

"A bag of peanut M & M's, and a movie from the early 90's"

Yeah...I haven't changed much since then...well, ok, I have changed a LOT, but that it a story for another time...my point it that my rambling, sometimes crazy, ADHD brain hasn't changed...

I mean seriously y'all...I was making a few Memory Verse graphic for my AWESOME church earlier tonight, which led to some crazy texting with a friend, followed by me making coffee at 8:55pm, being inspired, and making this:

Yep...welcome to my world...but you know, as crazy, and mixed up as my world can be, it's not a bad thing...we all need to be a bit silly at some times...

You know, this started out as a completely random, short post, but I am going to get a bit deeper for a sec...I know I am not the best blogger, and certainly not the most consistent...I blog regularly for a bit, then fall down an internetless well for a while...I have tons of good ideas, and ALWAYS have the BEST of intentions when starting a project, or joining a team...I have been able to meet some AMAZING friends over the years through the blogging community, and can't stand the though that I frequently let them, as well as my readers down on various things...I pray that everyone knows in their hearts that I ALWAYS have the best of intentions...I have struggled with ADD for most of my life, and my brain just get's overloaded...not to mention that if I told y'all everything that has happened in my life over the course of the last year, you would either get depressed at the thought, or think I was a liar...I'm not, and it has been a HARD year...
We have been tested in our lives, our faith, and our relationship...

BUT

We also found our AMAZING church within this last year, and THAT is what has me in tears while I am writing this....not all of the bad things that have / are happening...the GOOD,

they are tears of JOY....

because God is GOOD,
and I WILL praise him in this and EVERY storm! 

I think that in addition to flat out priorities, lack of time management, etc, my blogging hiatus' are often a product of insecurity and stress...

I was always the unpopular one growing up...Those feelings linger even through adulthood...The feelings of paranoia and not belonging...It is hard for me to be happy in who I am even still today, and sometimes find myself falling into the trap of trying to be a LITTLE more like this person, or maybe I should be more like this person...losing ME in the process...

I get to the point of what is right, and what is wrong in the blogging world, that it is no longer fun...it is no longer a stress releaver, but a stress producer...I have written posts in the past for a great homeschooling site, while I loved the articles I wrote...and they had the same professional feel to them as the other contributors produced, that I burned myself out...while I can/will sometimes write posts like that, I need to remember that I can come here and write posts like this too...

The posts that may not be thought out, may take a TOTAL 180 degree turn from the original point of the post...the posts where I can just be ME...because that's who I am...Yes, I am that girl in the picture in the right hand side of my blog, I am the "I am a Christian, Homeschooling, Blogging, Business Owning, Photography loving Wife and mommy." touted on my twitter homepage...but I am also the ADHD, still sometimes insecure, total geek...the one who watches Doctor Who & Sherlock, the one who loves playing video games, and who has read insane amounts of both fan fiction & manga...

The point, I suppose is, if you haven't figured it out, that this is full disclosure...my thought process in figuring things out...because, having a popular blog is GREAT...

but having a blog where I can not only post helpful things, but where I feel comfortable...where I feel I can come post just about anything on my mind, and have that be accepted... 

THAT'S the blog I want and need to have!

*sigh*  well that went a TOTALLY different direction than I had planned...for those who have stuck with me through the good times, as well as the (sometimes very long) blogging hiatus' THANK YOU SO MUCH!  Seriously to all of my followers...even if after this post, it's only 2, ;)  Y'all mean the world to me!!  

I love you ALL!  

~Jules

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Happy 8th Birthday Princess!

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8 years ago today I was in the hospital waiting for our beautiful baby girl to be born! The time has flown by, and we couldn't be more proud of our beautiful girl!! We love you SO much princess!!!

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How do you cope when tragedy strikes?

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Ok, Ok...I know this is my third post in one day, and I know that that is a BIG blogging no no...especially after being on a blogging hiatus for over a month, but I felt God pushing me to write this, and really, who am I to argue???

What do you do when tragedy strikes?

How do you react?  

How do you cope?  

We are ALL different, and this is no more apparent than in the way that we deal with a tragedy.  Do you sit around, GLUED to the TV or do you try to ignore it...maybe you are somewhere in between.

Today's tragedy in CT has pushed many of us to find out how we cope, whether we wanted to know or not...I am SO blessed to be a Christian, and to be able to fall back on God, and know that he is in charge.  My heart goes out to those effected personally by the tragedy, as well as those watching at home who are effected.  The latter of those groups are the ones I would like to talk to in this post...

It is VERY important while watching and reading the news to remember your boundaries...What can you handle?  It is SO easy to be sucked into news footage, feeling sometimes almost like it is your duty to watch and share in the countries heartbreak.  Let me tell you right now, while you may share in the country's heartbreak, you do NOT have to focus your day on it...It is so easy to cross the boundary to obsessing without even realizing it...

I have never shared this, but feel the need to now...My wakeup call for this very fact came on 9/11.  I like most of the country, sat glued to the TV, watching the second plane hit, watching the towers fall, mourning with our nation.  When I wasn't watching the TV that day, I was listening to the radio...my day and week were consumed by the tragedy...As time went by, the news was less and less on the subject, life resumed, and while we never forgot 9/11, time heals us...

Here is the thing....had I been "normal", that would have been the end of it, but looking back, it was far from the end.  Even though I was not personally effected by 9/11, by looking back, I know that I entered a small state of paranoia and depression.  In addition to my mild depression, I also became paranoid about the area we live in, the fact that we have multiple military bases in the area, as well as having shipbuilding, AND a port, all make this area prime targets...I became complacent to the fact that if another attack were to happen, it would probably be on our area...It wasn't only that though....I also became paranoid with my personal health...crying myself to sleep multiple nights when I noticed ANYTHING off about my body....elevated heart rate, pain in my head, etc...I was worried I may not make it through the night...(looking back most, if not all of the things that worried me were probably brought on my stress/anxiety)

The point is not to bring back 9/11, or to add stress to anyone local that reads my blog.  The point is this...knowing myself, when something like this happens, I know not to run to the TV or stalk the news sites.  I know that by reading snippets from news sites, and friends posts, I get the news I need, I still mourn with my country, but without causing myself grief that may push me to cross that invisible line.

All that to say this...When something like this happens, be sure to step back and assess how you are handling things...It's ok to turn the channel, close that tab, etc...If later you want to go back to it, that's fine, but do so with a mindset that you won't let yourself get pulled over the edge.  Make yourself be self aware.

No one will think any less of you because you didn't see every newscast, read every heartbreaking account, etc.

You know yourself better than ANYONE else, 

do what's right for YOU!  

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...and for a quick announcement...

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AND on another note, some of y'all may already know this, but I am a shiny new Blessings Unlimited Consultant!!

I Really love this company and their products!!  I am specializing in catalog and online parties!  You can also order directly from my website!!

Prayers are appreciated!!

On that note, the last day to guarantee delivery before Christmas is TONIGHT, December 14, at midnight, PST. 

There are still some AWESOME deals left on the Christmas Sale too!!

Don't miss out!!

If you have ANY questions, feel free to shoot me an e-mail!  Also I would appreciate some love on my Blessings Unlimited facebook page!

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